Tulpa.info - tulpa-questions

I don't think I've ever seen your tulpas talk here now that I think about it.

We are nifty system.

12:19 AM

You have likely seen nifty or katie talk here.

Oh yeah we've met Katie! Didn't realize you were their host

Nowadays its just me, although others sometimes talk through my account (we wont say who is who). Or i will talk on behalf of them.

Dawn 🕯

Oh yeah we've met Katie! Didn't realize you were their host

No, im a tulpa. Nifty is the original.

Oh, sorry, we obviously don't know your system very well

Desting 😎 (Con Cat)-(おひたし、お浸し)

In our system we share enjoyment, we dont mind much who is fronting.

And so we don't. That's a good approach.

I love when people think the wrong person is the host, it never fails to amuse me

1

Its normal, we do weird things, for example i sometimes talk on behalf of nifty, it is me phrasing and doing the language part but nifty decides "what to say". Katie has also talked through this account in some occasion.

We typically only use the bots unless we're speaking for the system as a whole

I got a bot on my own account i think

a

12:27 AM

Should I just constantly use this?

Based, absolutely

Fr

Can using tulpa guides (edited)

6:58 PM

improve communication between alters? And yes i know tulpas and alters are different

6:58 PM

and can you learn to control your switching more with tulpa guides?

6:59 PM

its not really for me

I mean, I dont think it will hurt

im not disordered, its for a person

I dont know if it will help but I dont see it causing a negative affect

7:00 PM

So try it if you think it can help. Obviously a therapist is preferable but if you don't have access to one tulpa guides might help a bit

its not for me

7:02 PM

i dont have did/osdd

7:02 PM

its for another person

7:02 PM

she is seeing a therapist but it only started now

I can't personally speak to it but we know some DID systems who have publicly stated that tulpamancy guides have been beneficial to them, I think we even did a poll on r/tulpas a bit back on it. Let me grab it and take a look

I think it would be wiser to let therapist work with her rather than finding help for her on your own.

i dont think it is a substitute for a therapist, just using tulpa guides wont solve her problems fully (edited)

7:05 PM

but if it does help, even a bit, shouldn't she try?

It should help if it's a good guide

Ideally they should have a therapist and then if desired try out the guides and see if it helps or doesn't.

she is going to one but it started recently from what she said

The guides should be useful in some form from our research

7:07 PM

https://www.reddit.com/r/plural/comments/u7e1o2/non_tulpa_systems_have_tulpamancy_guides_ever/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button

r/plural - Non tulpa systems, have tulpamancy guides ever helped you?

28 votes and 14 comments so far on Reddit

7:07 PM

This was a pretty bad survey but some of the comments are interesting

Yuka

It should help if it's a good guide

but...do you guys have any recommendations then?

The question is very vague, it'd be easier if the actual person was here

Adeus.

she is going to one but it started recently from what she said

I think if it started recently, it might be a good idea to wait a little for her to get used to the therapy before going for alternative methods immediately.

oh wait a minute i read it wrong...she didnt started it recently she told the therapist recently im really dumb

7:14 PM

Alejandro

I think if it started recently, it might be a good idea to wait a little for her to get used to the therapy before going for alternative methods immediately.

but yes you are right

if did self-help guides are terrible and even counterproductive for treating DID, can tulpamancy guides be better? Not sure

you have a point

Oddly enough that's one thing I've heard over and over again from DID systems who do use tulpamancy guides, they chose to start using them because DID community guides were shit and the tulpamancy guides worked better.

can you remember examples how they helped?

No clue how that works or how accurate it is, just something I've heard stated on multiple occasions

9:56 PM

Two of the big ones are that it helped with communication and gave some systems more control over their switching

9:57 PM

Some liked how it could help define more blurry headmates from one another too using techniques

an important part in figuring out whether they actually help or not is figuring out how DID guides differ from tulpamancy guides I'd think

9:57 PM

like exact differences

did guides are extremely enabling

9:59 PM

imagine someone with borderline personality disorder whose symptoms resemble switches but without communication between two “personality states” misdiagnoses themselves with did and reads a tulpamancy guide. Their perspective will be “i built communication with my alter!” When what they did was actually personality forcing of a tulpa To them it seems validating and helpful

1

In our experience DID guides seem to be more like validity porn than actual advice material.

10:00 PM

I can't comment on much though since we haven't read that many

or imagine alters that are not that separate, maybe it’s just dissociative amnesia. Building communication actually pushes them away, makes them feel more independent and enjoy being separate, that makes it harder in the future to potentially fuse

10:01 PM

you can easily turn osdd1a into did if you read and follow a tulpamancy guide

KiTTiKaTTy( •̀ .̫ •́ )✧

imagine someone with borderline personality disorder whose symptoms resemble switches but without communication between two “personality states” misdiagnoses themselves with did and reads a tulpamancy guide. Their perspective will be “i built communication with my alter!” When what they did was actually personality forcing of a tulpa To them it seems validating and helpful

never thought of that as an example of how self-dxing could go very wrong, definitally saving that

i only see potential for self-inflicted harm that seems like help

10:09 PM

based on my experience, my current view on did is that one side of it is it’s about being natural in (disordered) tulpamancy. New headmate can appear when you disown a part of you, for any reason. If you try to build communication with an alter, that’s basically disowning a part of you, which can cause a split. If you suffer from dissociative disorders, you can definitely have a full blown blackout without an alter fronting. The difference between a blackout with and without alter is how you interpret it

Well a major amount of people with DID actively would choose death before fusion, so I'm not sure they care.

did you ever wonder why that’s the case?

They found final fusion being pushed on them as dehumanizing and unmaintainable (from those I've talked to)

and yeah i agree that a HUGE majority of people with did are terrified to death of fusion, which of course makes sense they wouldn’t mind more validating splits to happen

10:13 PM

Well a major amount of people with DID actively would choose death before fusion, so I'm not sure they care.

@Dawn

(@Candlelight Society 🕯) - jump did you know that symptoms, beliefs and approach to different stuff (especially fusion) of people with did differ depending on group they are a part of? People with did are very suggestible, if they see someone with did that are terrified of fusion they start being terrified too

10:13 PM

there is a reason why there are no support groups for DID

10:14 PM

getting very unstable, suggestible people to support each other is a very bad idea

10:14 PM

which is why did communities are such a disaster

There's been historically support groups for DID I think

you might be thinking about the gatherings where people with did are being taught techniques and being educated in a group to save costs

10:17 PM

it’s not the traditional group support where people share their experiences etc

10:17 PM

the group support is very, very limited for people with did in psychology

10:19 PM

don’t get me wrong, i’m not saying everyone with did should decide for final fusion

10:19 PM

but if you join a group where final fusion is taboo, it’s not your decision to rather die than fuse

10:22 PM

usually treatment for did has 3 steps: -teaching techniques and healthier coping mechanisms than dissociation -then, when patient is ready to face it, treating trauma -working towards integration, which doesn’t necessarily mean fusion

10:24 PM

people with did that use tulpamancy guides to communicate with their alters want to skip all of that and to reach integration (which building communication between alters with amnesia barriers actually is) which has a potential of being extremely destabilising

10:25 PM

i’ve seen it many times, and have experienced it myself

10:27 PM

it’s weird how even destabilisation can feel validating and think it’s helping yourself

I wasn't aware of all that, I'll try to keep it in mind. A common issue, though, is a lot of people who have or may have DID have no support/access to good therapy, and may still be living in the environment that is affecting them. Without proper support their best options may include figuring things out themselves or with guides for communication, switching etc

that’s absolutely true and i have no idea what i always struggled finding things to say to people still being stuck in unsafe environment or not being able to affort therapy

10:29 PM

suggest

KiTTiKaTTy( •̀ .̫ •́ )✧

usually treatment for did has 3 steps: -teaching techniques and healthier coping mechanisms than dissociation -then, when patient is ready to face it, treating trauma -working towards integration, which doesn’t necessarily mean fusion

What exactly is intergration?

The best thing that comes to my mind is to just wait it out and get the hell out when you can which is really a non-advice. looking back i know for sure being part of did community while i was still in unsafe environment would turn my life into a bigger nightmare

10:32 PM

in the end of the day dissociation is a coping mechanism that helps you survive overwhelming situations. After treatment my biography doesn’t seem that bad anymore and it’s funny how i see dissociation my ally and best protector now

10:33 PM

What exactly is intergration?

@Desting 😎 (Con Cat)-(おひたし、お浸し) - jump it’s lowering dissociative barriers

10:38 PM

in that context

KiTTiKaTTy( •̀ .̫ •́ )✧

What exactly is intergration?

@Desting 😎 (Con Cat)-(おひたし、お浸し) - jump it’s lowering dissociative barriers

Then learning communication could actually do the oposite if you are not already separated woudnt it?

yes that’s my point

Okey, i didnt understand.

so to make sure I end up remembering to do narration I put a little rubber band on my finger- whenever I look at it it reminds me. but then I realized I'm less associating what I'm talking to with a presence in my mind or whatever and more with the presence of the rubber bands sometimes would that be good or bad

Bad, but it really depends on you if the damage there is worse than the good of the band reminding you to force. If you can remember not to associate your talking to the band that would be best. Or alternate wearing it every other day could help

Deleted User

so to make sure I end up remembering to do narration I put a little rubber band on my finger- whenever I look at it it reminds me. but then I realized I'm less associating what I'm talking to with a presence in my mind or whatever and more with the presence of the rubber bands sometimes would that be good or bad

I believe i talked about how i did to remember in the past

7:53 PM

Which might be of help for you

7:54 PM

I associated talking to katie with specific situations/places/moments/things that happen in my routine.

7:54 PM

At some point it would be katie talking to me in those scenarios.

uhh hello

3:44 AM

i have a question.

hi What is it?